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Reflections on the Messy Complexity of Chronicity

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Anticipation

Evelyn Herwitz · March 7, 2023 · 4 Comments

If all goes according to plan, next week I will be traveling to Germany to research my second novel. (Where is the first novel, you might ask? It’s in search of a literary agent, a long process. Details at my author’s website.) The second novel is set in Germany during 1928-1938, and I’m heading for Berlin, Dessau, and Munich. As we all know, when it comes to travel (and life in general) the adage “Man plans, God laughs” is often apt.

So, fingers crossed.

This is the first time I have ever ventured abroad on my own. I never traveled as a teen or young adult, with the exception of a two-week, whirlwind trip with my sister in 1973, a gift from our grandmother, who wanted us to see her German homeland and get a taste of Europe. We traveled by Eurailpass, back when it was really cheap to go First Class, from London to Berlin (we took the train-ferry across the English Channel to Belgium, then flew into Berlin since access was limited because the country and city were still divided), and on from Berlin to Copenhagen, Amsterdam, Zurich, and Paris. We stayed in youth hostels, dragged our suitcases everywhere, saw a lot, but decided to come home a few days early because we were totally exhausted.

In recent years, Al and I have traveled to Israel and made several wonderful trips to Europe, plus a lovely visit to Canada this past summer, and I’ve gained a lot of experience with travel planning. With this trip, I’m putting all of that to good use. I’ve cleared my plan with my entire medical team, who have been universally supportive and encouraging. And Al and our daughter are, as ever, supportive, too.

After all the restrictions of the pandemic and the past couple of years trying to figure out what exactly has been going on with my heart and lungs, I am both grateful to be feeling up for the adventure and trying my best to stay healthy prior to and during my travels. More than just a trip I’ve been dreaming of for several years and planning for months, this is a personal-best challenge to myself. I need to know, as I approach my 69th birthday next month, that I can just do it.

So, if all goes according to plan, I will be taking a break from writing here for a few weeks. I hope to have some great stories and photos to share when I’m back at the end of the month. In the meantime, Dear Reader, be well.

Evelyn Herwitz blogs weekly about living fully with chronic disease, the inside of baseballs, turtles and frogs, J.S. Bach, the meaning of life and whatever else she happens to be thinking about at livingwithscleroderma.com. Please view Privacy Policy here.

Image: Stefan Widua

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Filed Under: Body, Hearing, Mind, Sight, Smell, Taste, Touch Tagged With: body-mind balance, finger ulcers, managing chronic disease, mindfulness, resilience, stress, travel

The Year That Was

Evelyn Herwitz · December 27, 2022 · Leave a Comment

When I was in elementary school, my parents loved watching a TV program on NBC called That Was the Week That Was. Biting political satire was TW3’s forté, and nothing was off limits, from abhorent civil rights murders in Mississippi* to Barry Goldwater’s 1964 presidential bid. Adapted from the BBC original, the US program ran from 1964-1965, and introduced host David Frost to American audiences in the second season. Among the regulars were Henry Morgan, Phyllis Newman, Alan Alda, and Nancy Ames. Tom Lehrer wrote some his most famous songs for the program, including Vatican Rag and National Brotherhood Week.

I was so inspired by the show that in the sixth grade, I convinced one of my friends to help me write a version of the TW3  theme song as “That Was the Year That Was” to present to our fellow classmates as an idea for a class play. Needless to say, it went over like a lead balloon, because none of the other kids had any idea what we were singing about. But I have to credit my teacher, who at least let us give it a try. And, fortunately, there was no backlash from parents over our left-leaning politics.

There’s no shortage of political satire on TV and the Internet today, certainly, but TW3 originated the genre, and I wonder what they would have made of 2022. Plenty of material to parody, from botched Covid messaging to outrageous candidates in the Midterms. I just wish today’s TV satirists would rely less on obscenities for laughs and more on the kind of wry, pointed political commentary that TW3 pioneered.

This past year has been laden with so many tragic events—brutal war, needless deaths from the pandemic, too many mass shootings (and by that I mean even one is too many, which we’ve far exceeded), over-the-top partisanship and division, devastating storms driven by climate change—that it sometimes feels hard to find something to laugh about. But we lose our sense of humor at our peril. To quote the ever-quotable Mark Twain, “The human race has only one really effective weapon and that is laughter.”

As we say goodbye to 2022 this weekend and welcome (perhaps with some trepidation after the last few years) what 2023 has in store, here’s hoping that whatever comes, we all find some good reasons to laugh at our very human foibles, make some time to be silly, and face truths worth contemplating at the heart of the joke.


* Some readers may find this YouTube clip offensive. I doubt if it would be allowed on TV today, risking backlash from both ends of the political spectrum. But the musical sketch was intended to shock, for obvious reasons that still sting the American psyche today—as well it should.

Evelyn Herwitz blogs weekly about living fully with chronic disease, the inside of baseballs, turtles and frogs, J.S. Bach, the meaning of life and whatever else she happens to be thinking about at livingwithscleroderma.com. Please view Privacy Policy here.

Image: “Men, possibly broadcasting technicians, seated in front of bank of television sets at the Democratic Headquarters at the Mayflower Hotel, Washington, D.C. on election night, November 3, 1964.” Library of Congress PPOC

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Filed Under: Body, Hearing, Mind, Sight Tagged With: resilience, stress

Frazzled

Evelyn Herwitz · December 20, 2022 · 6 Comments

It’s that time of year when everyone is running around trying to finish up last-minute holiday shopping, fretting over holiday menus and meal prep, and stressing over holiday travel, all while Covid once again seems to be nipping at our heels. (PSA: Please get your Covid bivalent booster and flu shot ASAP if you haven’t already!)

Which is why I was grateful to just sit and finish the Times crossword while our Hanukkah candles burned Sunday night, the first night of the eight-day festival. It was peaceful and our home smelled delicious from the latkes Al was frying. And very good they were, too!

I still have a few small gift errands to run. I’ve also, in recent years, shifted from gifts to charitable donations for family members. I ask what they’d like me to support and then make a donation in their names. Everyone feels good, and there’s no risk of the gift being delayed or late, not fitting, or ending up on a shelf. And it’s easy to do.

Still, the frenzy can be contagious, which can be fun if you like all the stimulation. For my inner introvert, however, peaceful moments watching candles burn is more to my liking.

In the midst of all this, whatever your preferred holiday mode, it’s good to know that the Winter Solstice falls on this Wednesday, December 21. Which means that this Thursday, the days will start getting longer again. The difference may be infinitesimal, but in my mind, realizing we’re making the seasonal turn here in the Northern Hemisphere is always a huge.

And with that, I wish you, Dear Reader, a joyful holiday, whatever you celebrate. Let the light shine in.

Evelyn Herwitz blogs weekly about living fully with chronic disease, the inside of baseballs, turtles and frogs, J.S. Bach, the meaning of life and whatever else she happens to be thinking about at livingwithscleroderma.com. Please view Privacy Policy here.

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Filed Under: Body, Mind, Sight, Smell, Taste Tagged With: body-mind balance, mindfulness, resilience, stress

Things That Go Bump in the Night

Evelyn Herwitz · September 13, 2022 · 2 Comments

Returning Sunday afternoon from a four-day weekend in Raleigh, North Carolina, for a very sweet family wedding and a celebration of our elder daughter’s birthday with friends and family, I was exhausted. It was our second trip in just two weeks, and per usual, I managed all the logistics—which I enjoy doing and am good at, but there’s always a lot to track. So, it was great to get home, with no more responsibilities for anyone else, and go to bed early.

I slept for ten hours. At some point, maybe around 3:00 a.m., I suddenly woke because I thought I heard a loud musical note. Yes, I know, that sounds weird. It was. Some kind of plucking of a stringed instrument or a bell or what, I can’t recall. But it was quite distinctive. I became conscious enough to realize I’d imagined it and, thankfully, went back to sleep.

This is not the first time I’ve woken from a loud noise that wasn’t there. Occasionally I’ve roused because I’m sure the telephone rang (we still have a landline, believe it or not). Then I’ll realize it didn’t and go back to sleep.

So, after Sunday night’s weirdness, I looked online for hearing loud noises in your sleep. And, sure enough, the phenomenon is real. In fact, it has a very evocative name: Exploding Head Syndrome (EHS).

No one knows what causes EHS, but apparently it is more common among women. It doesn’t harm your health, and there is no known cure. It may be triggered by fatigue and stress. It also may be related to damage or dysfunction of the inner ear, which, in my case, seems a possibility, given that we had just flown, which affects pressure in my ears, I have occasional episodes of vertigo due to loose crystals in my inner ear, and have had tinnitus in both ears for decades.

In any case, at least now I know what’s going on. And given all the distressing craziness of our world these days, knowing that my head actually is exploding surely fits the moment.

Evelyn Herwitz blogs weekly about living fully with chronic disease, the inside of baseballs, turtles and frogs, J.S. Bach, the meaning of life and whatever else she happens to be thinking about at livingwithscleroderma.com. Please view Privacy Policy here.

Image: David Matos

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Filed Under: Body, Hearing, Mind Tagged With: body-mind balance, managing chronic disease, resilience, stress, travel

If a Tree Falls

Evelyn Herwitz · August 2, 2022 · Leave a Comment

The day after the 2016 election, a crew from our city’s forestry department came to our house. We had requested that they prune dead branches on our Norway maple. But, to my dismay, they were actually planning to take the tree down. I ran outside and talked them out of it, and instead, they did the necessary pruning. I was far too upset about the election to lose a tree, too.

The Norway maple continued to bear new leaves each spring. A few limbs died off, but because it’s a city tree, our arborist is not supposed to prune it. Nonetheless, it seemed to be doing okay.

That is, until this past Saturday. Around 3 o’clock, I was relaxing and reading in our living room when I heard a strange crash. A large limb of the Norway maple had just fallen across the street. No warning. Thank God, no one was walking or driving by at that moment.

What do you do when a tree falls across the street on the weekend? I called 911, and the police said they’d contact the public works department. Our neighbors gathered round and exchanged surprise over our tree’s sudden demise. Cars turned back as they came upon the limb, which had made the street impassible. About an hour later, a guy from DPW arrived and put traffic cones on either side. He said it would be a while before a crew could come and deal with it. Another tree had also fallen elsewhere in the city, and the forestry department is short-staffed.

I went back inside to read. A few hours later, several of our neighbors kindly took it upon themselves to move the limb to the side of the street, so cars could drive by, and I thanked them. When the DPW finally came back, they said they would return on Monday. The entire tree would have to go, because it was clearly unsafe.

And so, yesterday morning, a crew arrived. They put the fallen limb and broken branches in a chipper and then proceeded to take down the tree. I counted its rings later—at least 35 years, and probably older. Decades to grow, an hour to fell. The house looks bare in front.

I plan to request a new tree be planted in its place, once the stump is ground down. I know it was necessary, this time, to remove it. At least I was able to give it nearly six more years to live, and no one was injured when its time came.

Years ago, I wrote a book about the history of our city’s urban forest and how it was suffering from neglect. That book struck a chord and helped to inspire a massive replanting program after a major infestation of Asian Longhorn Beetles about 15 years ago. Over the past year, I have worked with a small group of concerned citizens to create a long overdue Urban Forestry Tree Commission, to deal with issues like funding the forestry department, developing an effective citywide pruning program, and doing a better job of planting and stewarding our public trees. A week ago, our City Council finally approved members of the Commission, and it will begin meeting this fall. I was also appointed by the City Manager this past winter to serve on an advisory committee to help implement a comprehensive plan for our city to meet the challenges of climate change. So, it’s all the harder for me to lose a tree. But health and safety take precedence.

It’s trite but true: Life brings many surprises. All we can do is our best to meet the moment.

Evelyn Herwitz blogs weekly about living fully with chronic disease, the inside of baseballs, turtles and frogs, J.S. Bach, the meaning of life and whatever else she happens to be thinking about at livingwithscleroderma.com. Please view Privacy Policy here.

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Filed Under: Body, Hearing, Mind, Sight Tagged With: mindfulness, resilience, stress

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About the Writer

When not writing about living fully with chronic health challenges, Evelyn Herwitz helps her marketing clients tell great stories about their good works. She would love to win a MacArthur grant and write fiction all day. Read More…

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I am not a doctor . . .

. . . and don’t play one on TV. While I strive for accuracy based on my 40-plus years of living with scleroderma, none of what I write should be taken as medical advice for your specific condition.

Scleroderma manifests uniquely in each individual. Please seek expert medical care. You’ll find websites with links to medical professionals in Resources.

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