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Living with Scleroderma

Reflections on the Messy Complexity of Chronicity

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finger ulcers

Bandage Break

Evelyn Herwitz · September 30, 2025 · 4 Comments

It’s taken nine months, but the ulcer on my left ring finger has finally healed—for now. I must add the caveat, because I never know when the skin will deteriorate again.

But for now, it feels great to be out of bandages on that finger. Last January, it became infected, I lost the nail and was in considerable pain. My go-to antibiotic failed to clear it, so I saw an ID specialist who put me on Levaquin, which is powerful but cannot be combined with Ibuprofin, which I rely on for my joint pain. It also comes with risks of tendon tears. Fortunately, that didn’t happen, but I ended up needing Gabapentin to manage nerve pain. Visits to our hospital’s Wound Clinic finally helped me turn the corner with some new dressings, but it has been one very long haul.

I saw my NP at the Wound Clinic about ten days ago and asked her advice for weaning my finger from its bandages. This is always a tricky step. If I go without too soon, my ulcers inevitably get worse. She encouraged me to try using a moisturizing cream (Eucerin is my initial go-to) without a bandage at night, and I finally worked up the courage to do that a few days ago. At night the risk is always for the uncovered ulcer to dry out and start smarting, costing precious sleep.

Fortunately, that didn’t happen, either. I’ve been able to keep off the bandage since the weekend, even did some housework and had no issues. And so, I’m grateful to be at this point, at least for the time being. Even with scleroderma, my skin can still heal, which is a miracle in itself. And any break from bandaged fingers is a much appreciated vacation.

Evelyn Herwitz blogs weekly about living fully with chronic disease, the inside of baseballs, turtles and frogs, J.S. Bach, the meaning of life and whatever else she happens to be thinking about at livingwithscleroderma.com. Please view Privacy Policy here.

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Filed Under: Body, Mind, Touch Tagged With: finger ulcers, hands, managing chronic disease, resilience

Threading the Needle

Evelyn Herwitz · September 23, 2025 · 4 Comments

I finished sewing another dress this weekend, just in time for Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year, which begins today. It’s customary to wear something new for the holiday. As per usual, however, I started making this dress, which I’ve been thinking about all summer, just as the weather was turning cooler. It’s a lightweight, very silky rayon knit, beautiful but tricky fabric (also per usual—I always seem to pick what’s hardest to handle). Not autumnal material.

By a stroke of good fortune, however, Tuesday here is supposed to be warm again, for one day. I’m writing on Monday afternoon, fingers crossed. And if it is actually cooler than expected, I bought a long-sleeved silk shirt and leggings to wear underneath. So, hopefully, this will all work out as planned.

In any case, I picked the fabric both for its floral print and drape. It’s very soft and wonderfully fluid. Which made it challenging to sew. And so, I had to hand baste some critical seams in place before stitching them with my sewing machine. This included tacking down the inner waistband facing and the very, very, very long hem (it’s a wrap dress).

Hand sewing is the best way to achieve accuracy in a garment, but it is extremely challenging for me at this point. Not only because my fingertips have resorbed significantly, but also because I have so many bandages on my fingers. Which makes it hard to feel what I’m doing.

Not only that, threading the needle is tricky because of my very dry eyes, due to Sjogrens. No matter what I do of late with various eye drops, I cannot clearly see something as small as the eye of a needle, especially of a fine needle for sewing rayon. It takes numerous tries, using a pair of tweezers to hold the tip of the thread and turning the needle this way and that to see the eye. Eventually I get it threaded, but not without uttering a string of choice words.

And inevitably, when I get to the end of a particular piece of thread, but not quite, I manage to pull the needle too far and lose the thread. Which means threading it again. Especially on a very, very, very long hem. Which lets loose another long string of choice words.

So why do I do this to myself? Sewing is supposed to be a fun, relaxing hobby, right? I guess I’m just stubborn. I refuse to give up this skill that I’ve honed since I was a teenager. The results are never perfect, but it always gives me a boost to wear something I’ve made well.

I’m really pleased with the dress, and even if I only get to wear it once until the weather warms up again next summer, it’s a good way to start the New Year—stubbornly refusing to relinquish my ability to make something beautiful, especially now.

Evelyn Herwitz blogs weekly about living fully with chronic disease, the inside of baseballs, turtles and frogs, J.S. Bach, the meaning of life and whatever else she happens to be thinking about at livingwithscleroderma.com. Please view Privacy Policy here.

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Filed Under: Body, Mind, Sight, Touch Tagged With: finger ulcers, managing chronic disease, resilience, sewing

Summer’s Gift

Evelyn Herwitz · July 15, 2025 · 4 Comments

There are a lot of reasons to complain about the heat this summer—too much, too humid, too risky. But there is also one big blessing for me: my finger ulcers are healing.

In particular, the left ring finger ulcer that I’ve been nursing since January through a lost nail and several rounds of antibiotics is much improved. A few visits to our hospital’s wound clinic were extremely helpful, especially learning the benefits of a special petroleum-jelly-infused gauze, typically used for burns, that has made a huge difference in managing the moisture level of the ulcer.

Keeping my ulcers moist but not too moist is always the key—and the trickiest part of this process. If the ulcer is not moist enough under the dressing, the skin tightens and becomes quite painful. But if it is too moist, the skin breaks down even further, takes longer to heal, and invites infections.

I also discovered that when my skin is extremely irritated, plain petroleum jelly is better than Aquafor, which has been my go-to ointment for decades. It contains lanolin alcohol, which can cause me issues. I confirmed this with wound clinic staff, and they said it’s not an uncommon reaction.

Another very useful medication that I received from the wound clinic is a steroid ointment, Triamcinolone Acetonide 0.5% (requires a prescription). This can only be used for seven days at a stretch, then you have to take a break. But it really calms inflamed skin.

I change my bandages twice daily, using whatever combination of dressings is most appropriate for that particular ulcer, a process that takes about a half-hour at present. Atop any ointment I place a small piece of very soft gauze, then anchor it with breathable fabric bandages. Right now, I’m down to four bandaged fingers during the day and three at night (one needs extra protection from typing).

My right thumb is my current problem child, with calcium bits beneath the surface, so I’ll bring that issue to the wound clinic this week when I review my situation. I also need advice for how to ween the left ring finger from dressings so the nail can (maybe) grow back.

I’ll never be free of my bandages. I’ve come to accept that fact. But I’m grateful, as always, for access to excellent medical care. And glad, even when it’s too hot, even for me, that summer is here, for now.

Evelyn Herwitz blogs weekly about living fully with chronic disease, the inside of baseballs, turtles and frogs, J.S. Bach, the meaning of life and whatever else she happens to be thinking about at livingwithscleroderma.com. Please view Privacy Policy here.

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Filed Under: Body, Mind, Touch Tagged With: finger ulcers, hands, managing chronic disease, resilience

Sew-sew

Evelyn Herwitz · July 8, 2025 · 4 Comments

I’ve had some sewing projects in mind for months—in particular, a dress that I sewed up last summer in a test fabric that I liked so much, I’ve been wearing it on hot days. It would look lovely and feel great in a very soft purple cotton blend that I’ve had in my fabric stash for, literally, decades.

So, with my digital ulcers doing better (summer bonus), though still bandaged, on July 4th I took the afternoon to cut out the pattern pieces. (I use a rotary blade for precision and ease of handling.) In so doing, I realized this would be a tricky project, because the fabric is so soft that it slips and stretches if I’m not careful.

Yesterday it was quite hot outside, in the 90s, so I had to put on the A/C. We have heat pumps that double as air conditioners, and they blow cooled air. Very effective, but with my Sjogren’s, they also dry my eyes even more than normal. But I had the time to start sewing, and I set to work.

It took me about a half hour to thread my serger, and more time to diagnose an issue with my sewing machine, which kept jamming until I realized that the thread had jumped one of the guide loops. The first dart sewed up perfectly. The second slipped despite pinning it in place (a challenge with bandaged fingers) and I had to remove stitches and redo it twice more. But I was not discouraged.

Four more seams on the serger sewed up nicely. I pressed everything carefully and moved on to the next step, a bias-bound neckline. And here’s where I ran into trouble.

When I made the test version, on more stable cotton, I was able to easily manipulate the material and sew it perfectly. But this fabric was a whole other animal. Using the same approach as last time was, simply put, a mess. I couldn’t control the fabric, my stitching was uneven, and I quit two-thirds of the way through the process because I realized it would not work.

Part of the problem was my hands—I could not feel the fabric through bandages in order to guide it in place. And part of the problem was my eyes—so dried from the A/C that my vision was blurring. Even using a small focused light wasn’t enough help.

So, with some difficulty I pulled out the stitches and put the project down. I have an idea of how to fix it, and enough left-over fabric, if needed. But if there’s one thing I’ve learned over the years, it’s to stop when I’m frustrated, set the problem aside, and give myself time to rethink my approach. It’s really hot again for the next couple of days, so I’ll need to take both my very dry eyes and my hands into account.

But I will finish the dress.

Evelyn Herwitz blogs weekly about living fully with chronic disease, the inside of baseballs, turtles and frogs, J.S. Bach, the meaning of life and whatever else she happens to be thinking about at livingwithscleroderma.com. Please view Privacy Policy here.

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Filed Under: Body, Mind, Sight, Touch Tagged With: finger ulcers, hands, resilience, Sjogren's syndrome

Rough Patch

Evelyn Herwitz · May 6, 2025 · 14 Comments

So, what I thought was “just” allergies last week turned out to be more complicated. When our geriatrics nurse practitioner came to our home for a check-up last week, she carefully listened to my lungs and informed me that I had not developed bronchitis, as I’d thought. No, I had pneumonia.

What? That was not on my bingo card. Glad she caught it before it got even worse. I started antibiotics that afternoon, and within a few days I was starting to feel like myself again. Thank goodness, because I was getting pretty worried about where all this was headed.

Also, on Monday night I had my acting class performance—first time on stage since elementary school, a scene from Tennessee Williams’s The Glass Menagerie. We’ve been rehearsing for months, and I sure didn’t want to have to miss it. (I’m writing on Monday afternoon, so fingers crossed all goes well.)

Next on the medical agenda is a tooth extraction on Wednesday and prep for another implant. So, yet another reason I need to get past this whole respiratory episode. The tooth is definitely failing, getting more sensitive, so it really can’t wait much longer.

Then on Thursday, it’s back to the Wound Clinic to check on my slowly healing ulcer. It’s improving gradually, but needs a lot of TLC.

When all that’s done, I need to get my spring Covid vax, I hope on Friday, if all goes according to plan. We’re traveling again soon, so all this has to be wrapped up by the end of the week.

Meanwhile, Al caught whatever I had that wasn’t allergies, and is doing better but still recovering.

Of course, it could always be worse. But this has been one rough patch. Here’s hoping we’re both finally on the mend.

Evelyn Herwitz blogs weekly about living fully with chronic disease, the inside of baseballs, turtles and frogs, J.S. Bach, the meaning of life and whatever else she happens to be thinking about at livingwithscleroderma.com. Please view Privacy Policy here.

Image: Nik

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Filed Under: Body, Mind, Touch Tagged With: finger ulcers, managing chronic disease, resilience, stress, tooth resorption

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About the Writer

When not writing about living fully with chronic health challenges, Evelyn Herwitz helps her marketing clients tell great stories about their good works. She would love to win a MacArthur grant and write fiction all day. Read More…

Blog Archive

Recent Posts

  • Drips and Drops
  • Out of Focus
  • Bandage Break
  • Threading the Needle
  • Making Progress

I am not a doctor . . .

. . . and don’t play one on TV. While I strive for accuracy based on my 40-plus years of living with scleroderma, none of what I write should be taken as medical advice for your specific condition.

Scleroderma manifests uniquely in each individual. Please seek expert medical care. You’ll find websites with links to medical professionals in Resources.

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